[intro-text size=”25px”] No need for a setup here. Here’s what the dogs I know think about the 2016 election, in their own words.[/intro-text]
Buster, 9-year-old Toy Poodle
It’s a hard choice this year, as it truly is deciding between the lesser of two evils. Personally, I was a Bernie supporter, and as much as I despise the two-party system, I still feel I have to support Hillary.
Rocky, 4-year-old German Shepherd
I long to return to zee Rhineland.
Ellie, 2-year-old Labrador Retriever
[stares intently at a frisbee]
Diesel, 7-year-old Boxer
Deport chihuahuas, Trump 2016.
Fluffy, 11-year-old Bichon Frise-Cocker Spaniel Mix
I’ve been lucky enough to live to see the first black president, and it has always been my dream to live to see the first female president. Just as long as the next president isn’t a god damn mailman.
Peaches, Ghost of My Grandmother’s Poodle
Why have you summoned my spirit from the beyond? Woof.
Brody, 6-year-old Mutt
It’s not important who you vote for. It’s important that you vote!
Matty, 13-year-old Jack Russell Terrier
Did I laugh at the idea of a dog saying “Barkghazi” for a solid five minutes then work backwards to figure out how I could write an article including that? Maybe.