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Rants and Raves

Rants and Raves

[intro-text size=”25px”]One girls attempt to bring the people of our city peace of mind by plundering the most salient inquiries, pillaging for honest and righteous truth, and applauding the play place that is the Internet.[/intro-text]

Fat guys and T/Polo knit shirts (around town)

Granted, many men are overweight, some much more than others. Why do some men that are dressing casually tuck a T-shirt or Polo knit into their pants? It makes already large bellies look even larger and strange! Men, pull your shirts out!

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Because the fashion of a polo shirt baffles even me from time to time, my first inclination was to do some Internet research on the collared item of clothing itself. Based in sport (contrary to many of its wearers), the polo shirt hails most popularly from the uniforms of polo, golf, and tennis. Top search engine results will try to tell you otherwise — that it is a garment for the masses — but take a peek at the Wikipedia page and try not to shudder as the shame of your ignorance washes over you. You may no longer be able to suppress the image of a beer belly flopping helplessly behind piqué cotton as our rider saddles up and swings his mallet majestically down the tempestuous 300 yards of a polo field. Imagine the unassailable grins on the faces of Ralph Lauren and Tommy Hilfiger as they high-five and roll around in your thankless piles of money.

For whatever reason, men who have probably never lasted beyond love-love in a tennis match have adopted this style. Perhaps an attempt to look professional while remaining casual, the polo shirt is essentially the mullet of menswear, with its business appeal on the top and untamed confusion at the bottom. The unsuspecting hem suffers diffidently as it is stuffed down the pleated khaki front, strangled between belly and belt.

Dearest ranter, while I get the feeling your beef (I did that on purpose) is ultimately with the evolution of men’s fashion, I can’t ignore your unresolved discontent with “fat guys around town.” Perhaps you yourself are an overweight man, reaching out for change — a sort of anonymous solidarity to tilt the menswear world on its axis. For that I applaud you, and for the way in which you command the powers of the Internet, situating yourself among myriad complaints of misguided trends. What better way to enact change, audaciously saving people from themselves, than to unite men of varying degrees of obesity in a movement of un-tucking their shirts? Let me hear your battle cry, Cleveland: Men, pull your shirts out!

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